February 2010


 

      

Tom Waits has a way of stripping away the shiny layers and revealing the truths embedded in this thing called life. He offers some words to remember if you have ever felt the tug of envy or jealousy toward those who may have a bigger, more expensive house and wished you could be doing as well.  All that square footage, the decorative columns, and landscaping is just gift wrapping  serving to impress. It is what is inside the box that really matters.

Take this song and turn it up loud in the car the next time you are passing through one of those affluent neighborhoods  so you can resist that old hobo jealousy yanking on your sleeve.

-Bobman

So if you find someone
Someone to have, someone to hold
Don’t trade it for silver
Don’t trade it for gold
I have all of life’s treasures
And they are fine and they are good
They remind me that houses
Are just made of wood
What makes a house grand
Ain’t the roof or the doors
If there’s love in a house
It’s a palace for sure…”

Tom Waits, House Where Nobody Lives

It is annoying enough to deal with the daily commute every day, but it makes it even more difficult to put up with awful drivers when they display their sound bite mental capacity on their bumpers, unintentionally giving insight into why many of these drivers are not intelligent enough to be operating a heavy piece of machinery in the first place.

To cope with the challenge of sharing the road with these people and their shallow bumper sticker jingoistic philosophy, it is fun to come up with alternative bumper stickers to the mindless vehicular clichés. Here are a few bumper stickers that would be cool to see:

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Keep the Más in Christmas


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I’m Dating Your Daughter and Spending All the Money You’re Sending to Texas A&M


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So Leave Me Alone, I Don’t Want To!
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My Academically Average Son, Beats Up Your Honor Roll Student for His Lunch Money at Gaylord Elementary

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-Bobman

                                              

 

A Happy Valentines Day greeting from my sensitive undude side:

And a Happy Valentines Day greeting from my insensitive dude side:

-Bobman

       

by Bob Langham

Glenn Beck is the modern day equivalent of Evel Knievel. They are both showmen offering the empty enticement of spectacle. Evel Knievel wore a cape and a star emblazoned jumpsuit and fed red meat to the lowest most primitive urges in the fans that flocked to his shows like vultures to a busy stretch of road. He performed record leaps over cars and busses, undeterred by fear, to the mindless delight of his fans.

Glenn Beck wears a suit, wraps himself in the stars and stripes, and feeds red meat to the lowest most primitive urges of his fans, who also flock to his shows like vultures to a busy stretch of road. He performs record leaps in logic, undeterred by facts, to the mindless delight of his fans.

But even Evel Knievel was honest about who he was – a showman, a daredevil, nothing more. He didn’t masquerade as a thinker, or prophet of and for the people. He knew and accepted the limits and the price of his chosen profession. He realized the crowds would cheer when he cleared the jump and landed safely on the other side. However, it must have kept him awake at night knowing that the crowds would cheer just as loud or even louder if he crashed and burned and didn’t walk away. Maybe, it is the burden of this truth combined with a generous dose of carnival theatrics that causes Glenn Beck to cry in public so uncontrollably and so often.

-Bobman